Colleen James

Tag: disappointment

  • Change of Plans

    Picture of a statue anchor outside a restaurant

    The heart of man plans his way,
        but the Lord establishes his steps.”

    Proverbs 16:9 ESV

    We would have been to the island and back by now. We would have enjoyed several sun-soaked days on the beach with my younger sister, been given an informal tour of the school where my brother-in-law is studying medicine, and enjoyed JJ’s birthday to the max, complete with the coconut cake that my sister was going to make him.

    Since it takes over an hour to get to the airport and our flight was scheduled to leave at 5 a.m. the following morning, we checked into a hotel that Saturday night. Everything was ready to go and we were about to turn off the lights. But then JJ saw a notification on his phone from the airline. Delayed. Our flight would leave three hours past the initial departure time, resulting in a missed connection and a flight to the island a day late. Neither JJ nor I were thrilled about the idea of such a long layover with two young children in tow, but just as we were trying to figure out what to do about it, JJ received a second notification. The flight was postponed altogether at this point. We would now be leaving at 5 a.m. on Monday.

    JJ and I were notably upset by the news, but we tried to make the most of the situation, taking care of some odds and ends the following day as we awaited our new flight. A new suitcase to swap with the one that was suddenly starting to tear. Some more sandwiches and snacks to replace the ones we already ate before our travel. And to end the day, an impromptu dinner with my parents in their cozy abode before another early night at a different hotel preparing ourselves yet again for a flight before dawn.

    We quickly got ready for bed and settled in for the night, and this time, the boys even fell asleep. Things were looking good. But then JJ thought to check his phone one more time, and the flight was once again delayed, resulting in what would now be an arrival to the island on Tuesday.

    Since we were only supposed to be on the island until that Thursday, we decided to cancel the trip altogether, and JJ quickly jumped online to finalize the cancelation with a travel agent and to try to recover our funds. It was a long, drawn-out process, and Liam woke up at some point throughout it all and bitterly cried when he realized we would no longer be taking our trip. We were all upset and perplexed by what had just happened.  Still, we were grateful to God in the midst of it all because we had asked Him to protect us on this trip, and we believed this was His way of answering that prayer.

    I told JJ that night that I would rather be disappointed than devastated. As sad as I was that evening and for several days later, I was so thankful that my family and I were safe and well and that God was protecting us from unknown dangers.

    With canceled plans, the promise of a refund in our bank account, and still a few free days for JJ from work, we ended up driving to a beach here in Texas, where we enjoyed a morning of ocean waves and sand and then ate a delicious seafood lunch overlooking the sea. It was a much simpler trip than the one we had originally envisioned, but the kids had fun, and JJ and I were content, too.

    I’ll probably always wonder the exact reason as to why we couldn’t take that trip to the island where my sister lives. What might have happened had we gone? But as those questions come to mind, I hope I forever remember the comment I made to Liam for instances such as these—the most important thing is that the four of us (in our nuclear family) are together. And as of now, we are.

  • An Unexpected Christmas

    I put on a cartoon about the first Christmas for my son over a week ago, and I’ve been reflecting on how unexpected the details of Jesus’ birth were ever since.

    For Mary, the angel Gabriel’s appearance and message to her was a complete surprise. She did not expect to be told that she’d be expecting as a young virgin woman, much less to the Savior of the world. She couldn’t have imagined that her much-older, barren cousin Elizabeth would be pregnant at the same time as her either, especially since Elizabeth was past the age of child-bearing. When Mary went to visit Elizabeth soon after Gabriel gave her the news, she could not have expected for Elizabeth to bless her and recognize her as the mother of her Savior, even before Mary had told Elizabeth all that had transpired. The exchange between them led to Mary exalting God as she perhaps understood more fully the special task that God had called her to.

    Joseph couldn’t have imagined the situation in which he would find himself when he discovered that his betrothed was pregnant. Although he decided to divorce her quietly, he once again experienced the unexpected when an angel appeared to him in a dream and told him to instead marry Mary. As a result of his obedience to God, he would have the enormous privilege of doing something beyond his wildest dreams. He would help Mary to raise the very Son of God.

    Both Mary and Joseph could not have imagined the trip they would have to take to Bethlehem in Mary’s advanced stages of pregnancy in order to participate in a mandatory census. They neither could have imagined that there would be no room for them in the inn and that Jesus would be born under those circumstances, his first makeshift crib a lowly manger.

    The shepherds watching their flock that evening could not have expected to experience such a momentous night. Not only did an angel announce the Savior’s birth, but they witnessed a whole host of angels praising the Lord. Little did they know that they’d be meeting the Messiah that evening, nor could they have realized that He would be the Great Shepherd and ultimate Sacrificial Lamb.

    The wise men probably never expected to follow a star to Bethlehem to find a specific child and worship Him. No one else could have imagined the reverence and honor that they would show the child either, nor could anyone have imagined the precious gifts with which they would present Him.

    The first Christmas happened in such an unexpected way, but it was through the unexpected events and details that God became flesh and dwelt among us. And because these different individuals were willing to surrender to God’s will through the unexpected events of their lives, they were given the privilege of being a part of a greater story that would surpass their lifetimes and be told and celebrated worldwide for the many years to come.

    Perhaps this Christmas was not what you were expecting. Perhaps it was laced with confusion, disappointment, frustration, or heartache. If that was your experience this year, then I pray that God would use the unexpected events and details of your life to birth a deeper sense of His presence in you.

    The One who came as a little baby and lived the human experience was not impervious to pain or grief.  The sin that effects this world and our lives so greatly today is the sin that led Him to suffer and die on a cross. He understands pain and suffering. He knows what it feels like to be abandoned and forsaken. And He understands what it means to mourn. After all, He wept too.

    He who became fully human for our sakes understands each intimate detail of our lives today, and He is full of deep compassion for us. Perhaps the unexpected details of our lives are the very areas where He would cause something beautiful to be born. Perhaps it is through them in which He would allow us to see a greater display of His power and glory. Whatever you may be facing today, I pray that God would allow to you to sense Him at work in your life and that He would overflow your heart with joy, peace, and a deep sense of hope.

    Perhaps, through surrendering to God’s will in the unexpected events of our lives, we will be given the privilege of being part of a greater story that will surpass our lifetimes—one that will have an eternal impact and that we can tell to our children and their children for the years to come.